Would you take your preschooler cruising? Or are toddlers and yachts a recipe for stress, sleep deprivation and restricted sailing?While going on a bluewater adventure with your family is a popular dream, the advantages of having a child that can understand instructions, occupy themselves with a book, and have mastered at least the basics of swimming, keep many families ashore until school age. But cruising, and even liveaboard bluewater sailing with young children can be done.
\nFour families cruising and sailing with young children share their tips on how to manage \u2013 and enjoy \u2013 sailing with very small crew.
\nNever too young to learn; going cruising before the school years can offer real freedom. Photos: chasingmoonrivernz.com
\nSooner rather than later
\nThere are many reasons for setting off with under-fives. For some families it is simply a case of not waiting \u2013 especially where older siblings want to rejoin formal education before their senior school years. Casting off sooner may enable you to sail for longer, even if taking it easy for the early stages. Going when children are younger may also negate the need to move up a size of yacht to increase the number of cabins.
\nFor many families the ability to go sailing without having to factor in \u2018boat school\u2019 is a huge draw. \u201cI found home schooling for pre-school and early primary school aged children was very easy and stress-free,\u201d recalls Carolyn Simpson, mother of four boys aged four to nine.
\nGaining an early understanding of charts. Photo: @resolutely_sailing
\nShe and her husband have lived aboard their 47ft Herreshoff ketch Moon River since their youngest son was born, cruising the Pacific when he was two and his brothers four, six and seven years old.
\n\u201cWe really just wanted to ensure that the boys weren\u2019t behind in reading and letter formation. Basic maths, alphabet etc can be learned as games and during day-to-day activities, and the lifestyle itself is an education.\u201d
\nFriendships are less critical at the preschool stage, which takes the pressure off finding other \u2018kid boats\u2019 \u2013 though maintaining relationships with wider family members, such as grandparents and cousins, can be harder with small children if relying on video calls or similar.
\nThe slow, simple life on board can suit a very young family, as Carolyn recalls: \u201cFor us all to be together as a family 24\/7 for extended periods of cruising, it [was] lovely having a newborn and not having a schedule. My memories of breastfeeding on board, relaxing on beaches, playing in the shallows, and sleeping in hammocks under trees are dreamy.\u201d
\nA trolley can make a good buggy substitute. Photo: @resolutely_sailing
\nBut there are obvious hurdles to overcome. Sleep deprivation is a huge factor during the early parenting years. Add in night watches, anchor monitoring, the challenges of getting proper rest while under way, of trying to sleep undisturbed in a small space \u2013 and a tropical climate \u2013 and it\u2019s easy to see why many sailing parents baulk at the idea of sailing with young children.
\nFactor in essential boat maintenance, the domestic workload, and possibly income generating work, and creating enough time for sleep can be challenging. For many families this means taking things very slowly. For others it means bringing in additional hands \u2013 extended family, an au pair, or deck crew.
\nThe health and safety concerns can seem daunting. All the usual hazards \u2013 falls, choking, burns \u2013 become amplified on board. With very young children who simply can\u2019t be relied on to follow key instructions, \u2018man-marking\u2019 becomes a full-time job. If one parent is looking after the boat, the other will need to be looking after the child(ren). Preventing man overboards, falls off jetties and pontoons, and safely transferring to and from a dinghy etc requires careful planning and constant vigilance.
\nThere is also the question of how sailing with young children will alter the experience of cruising itself. While diving coral reefs, or immersing oneself in different cultural experiences, are likely to be high on adult cruisers\u2019 wish lists, for young children the best moments involve the simple things. Finding a shallow sandy beach may become your anchorage goal.
\nPlaying on board. Photo: finedayforsailing.com
\n\u201cThere are elements of liveaboard life that toddlers can\u2019t appreciate the same way an older child could,\u201d points out Emily Lane, who is cruising with her husband, four-year-old son and two-year-old daughter on their Norseman 447 Resolute. \u201cI think we had grand visions of spotting dolphins together and teaching our kids the names of fish and seabirds\u2026 but to be honest, they\u2019re so young that nothing gets them excited like a good old fashioned playground. Our route along the Intracoastal Waterway was basically dictated by proximity to playgrounds.\u201d
\nPreparing to be tested
\nThe first thing any parents planning to cruise with young children should do is accept that plans may change. Heather Richard initially set off cruising with her ex-husband and three children, including a preschooler. She then continued sailing with her young children as a solo parent, bringing on additional crew when needed and using her experience as a sailing instructor to teach them additional skills.
\n\u201cI have some very unique experience as a single parent taking my three kids cruising solo. But it was quite easy to find young, capable, strong and willing crew who fit in easily with my family and added a lot to my kids education \u2013 and also gave them good role models. Their energy and positive attitude was fantastic for both me and the kids.\u201d
\nCarolyn Simpson also discovered how sailing with young children can challenge a relationship. \u201cOne of the biggest challenges early on was how tired we\u2019d get on passage, or even around the coast in stormy weather. It\u2019s very hard to keep an even keel with each other when we are both sleep deprived, but nothing a day on the beach resting while the boys run around doesn\u2019t fix! It helps that [husband] Richie is a very patient captain.\u201d
\nThe couple planned assiduously. \u201cWe both undertook offshore medical courses, sea survival courses, and Richie crewed on a passage to New Caledonia to gain experience. One of the most valuable things we did together was cast off the lines and live at anchor for three months while coastal sailing around New Zealand.
\nHowever, she admits: \u201cNo matter how well prepared we were, I was (and still am) quite worried about one of the boys getting injured or sick while we are on passage or somewhere remote. On top of that my self-doubt was a difficult hurdle to overcome.
\nSafe spaces for kids on the move. Photo: svkaiquest.com
\n\u201cWe have an amazing support network who were behind what we were doing, we got no negative comments or criticism for our lifestyle choice, but I couldn\u2019t shake a level of self-doubt!
\n\u201cThere is an element of risk to this lifestyle that is different from living ashore, so I think that weighs on my mind. But once we get underway a lot of that slips away and we find the lifestyle really relaxing, comfortable and exciting.\u201d
\nContainment zones
\nA lot of sailing with young children can be made easier by having the right kit on board, and thinking through systems and routines. Sarah and Will Curry know this more than most. The couple divide the year 50:50 cruising aboard their Jeanneau SO 43 Kaiquest and living ashore in Canada, while also running their company Hydrovane, makers of self-steering systems. They live aboard Kaiquest with their two-year-old twins, and have done so since the boys were babies. It was a daunting proposition.
\nThe Curry family aboard their Jeanneau SO 43 Kaiquest. Photo: svkaiquest.com
\n\u201cWe were travelling with 16 bottles (eight feeds a day times two!), a mammoth supply of formula, two car seats, a double stroller, and a high energy miniature poodle \u2013 running high on the adrenaline of love of being new parents!\u201d Sarah recalls. \u201cWe were tied to the dock (and laundry machine) for those first few months.\u201d
\nSarah and Will adapted different \u2018safe zones\u2019 in their boat as the boys grew. \u201c\u2018The Pit\u2019 was a custom lee cloth across our main saloon dropped-down table to create a baby rumble room,\u201d she explains.
\n\u201c\u2018The Cage\u2019 is our full cockpit enclosure. This was imperative for the toddler phase and made the cockpit 100% secure. We used Phifertex material, which is ideal for the tropics in that it provides sun protection, but you can see through it. It\u2019s also durable enough to contain two toddlers throwing their bodies against it.
\nSecurable seats are invaluable. Photo: svkaiquest.com
\n\u201cOne of my most useful purchases was two portable pop\u2018n\u2019sit chairs. We secure them in the cockpit so the twins can be strapped in safely when needed. They have eaten many meals in these chairs on board and out at restaurants.\u201d
\nHaving dedicated places for children to go during mooring or a manoeuvre is a strategy many parents recommend. Carolyn Simpson adds: \u201cIntroducing \u2018safety seats\u2019 was one of our most important safety tactics. If Richie or I said \u2018safety seats\u2019 all four boys would go to (or be put into) dedicated berths\/carseats\/seats which separated them and kept them safe while we dealt with anything thrown at us. We prepared snack bags for during busy times like anchoring and docking to keep all four quiet.
\nInspiring the next generation! Photo: svkaiquest.com
\n\u201cWe still use the same code-word today, but things have changed as the boys have gotten older. Jackson and Tasman might be asked to come up and help with things like docking, but otherwise they all remain in their seats until told it is safe to leave.\u201d
\nHaving strict rules that are stuck to consistently is key. \u201cThe boys all wear lifejackets and are tethered at all times when on-deck under way, these were the rules from day one and in all conditions so everyone knew the drill when we headed offshore,\u201d recalls Carolyn.
\n\u201cWhen we are on passage the boys don\u2019t leave the cockpit; this rule also applies to adult crew as much as possible! At anchor\/marina the boys weren\u2019t allowed to wander around the topsides without a lifejacket until they could confidently swim four laps of Moon River.\u201d
\n\u201cNobody is allowed in the cockpit without a lifejacket and an adult. Period,\u201d adds Lane.
\nSimplifying systems and sail handling so one adult can manage the boat is vital when sailing with young children. \u201cEverything is rigged on Kaiquest so she can be sailed solo. One of us tends to the twins, the other sails the boat. Sailing is the easy job,\u201d says Susan Curry. \u201cThe Hydrovane rudder takes over steering, which means Kaiquest\u2019s main rudder and two wheels are locked off. I now fully appreciate this safety feature for sailing with kids: there is no erratic movement of the wheels, and no chance of fingers or arms getting caught.\u201d
\nThe reality
\n\u201cI wish we\u2019d known that, when you live aboard a sailboat with kids, only about 5% of your time is spent actually sailing,\u201d recalls Emily Lane.
\n\u201cThe other 95% is spent in the day-to-day mundane details of living: feeding the kids, getting them to pick up their toys, making sure they\u2019re going down for nap, getting them on and off the dock safely, arranging for grocery deliveries, tracking down playgrounds and laundromats\u2026 the list goes on.
\n\u201cBut we\u2019re all doing it together in a (relatively) tiny little boat, all within a few feet of each other. The kids love being close to us, and we love being close to them. And in the end, that\u2019s really what makes living aboard worth it.\u201d
\nOnboard Entertainment
\nWith limited stowage onboard, large plastic toy sets won\u2019t be an option. Popular recommendations for sailing with young children include:
\n\u00b7 Lego\/Duplo. Giant drawstring play mat\/storage bags keep the pieces contained and out of the bilges.
\n\u00b7 Tool kits. Child-appropriate versions of a \u2018real\u2019 toolbox are universally popular with liveaboard kids. \u201cWe take these ashore and can sit back and relax while they create,\u201d says Simpson.
\n\u00b7 A \u2018survival kit\u2019 has similar appeal: add a flint and steel, whittling knife, whistle, walkie-talkies and a hammock\/den kit.
\n\u00b7 Magnatiles for mess-free creativity (just be careful where you store them on board as they are magnetic)
\n\u00b7 Journals. Even during \u2018no-school\u2019 days on passage many parents get kids to draw or write a few words each day.
\n\u00b7 Stationary rolls\/craft boxes. Glue guns, lollipops and pipe cleaners, paint, paper, and modelling clay \u2013 although these often only come out at anchor.
\n\u00b7 Fancy dress. Popular with little ones and easy to store. Also makes it easier to keep an eye on your child ashore if they\u2019re dressed as a cartoon character!
\n\u00b7 Water toys. SUPs, kayaks, water pistols. Don\u2019t forget swim goggles.
\n\u00b7 Tablets. Particularly invaluable on long passages, explains Emily Lane. \u201cWe treat it the same way you\u2019d treat a long-haul flight with toddlers. Routine goes out the window, there are lots of snacks involved, lots of time on the iPad.\u201d Kindle Kids tablets have a no-quibble replacement policy for devices that may take some knocks and spills
\non board.
\nFollow the families on Instagram @hydrovane, @chasingmoonriver, @resolutely_sailing
\n@finedayforsailing and on their blogs at svkaiquest.com, chasingmoonrivernz.com, finedayforsailing.com<\/p>\n
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Would you take your preschooler cruising? Or are toddlers and yachts a recipe for stress, sleep deprivation and restricted sailing?While going on a bluewater adventure with your family is a popular dream, the advantages of having a child that can … <\/p>\n